The Death of a Friendship

J.T. Miller
6 min readAug 9, 2022
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There is so much emphasis on the ending of a romantic relationship, that we never focus on the end of a friendship. There’s songs, movies, books, poetry, and much more all about the end of a relationship. But so little is said about the death of a friendship.

It happens all throughout life — it is natural to lose friends. It’s almost expected, though we don’t know it early on in life.

It comes in all forms. Some you lose during your school years due to social hierarchies. You stop having classes with your friends as you go from elementary to middle school. And then middle school to high school.

Then you have the post-high school friendships. Some you lose because one friend goes away to college and the other one stays home. You slowly lose touch with them. Meanwhile, they get involved in everything that’s offered in the college lifestyle. The two friends become unable to relate to one another, which creates a natural drift.

Then you have others that move away to a new state. You always promise you won’t let anything change. But the whole “out of sight, out of mind” thing is real. On both ends. They create a new life there, you create a new life where you are. The college and moving away kind of go hand-in-hand.

There’s always petty shit that happens that can end friendships, as well. For some people, they need a little drama in their lives to keep them going. It might be stupid things like weddings and the wedding party. It’s like the MySpace top 8 drama but in real life (if you know, you know). Or maybe you didn’t go to their party and now they’re bitter towards you.

It can be a jealousy thing that causes a rift and leads to the end of a friendship. Maybe they’re jealous of what you have and where you’re at in life. Or vice versa. That drives a wedge with friends and it’s hard to pinpoint because no one ever admits that they’re jealous.

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You also have the friends who get married and have kids. That person becomes hard to relate to if you’re a single person. Their entire life is upended by the kids, and you just don’t get it. Sometimes those friendships can…